Learning in Love

Every couple enjoys different types of activities together..... some couples go out for coffee in the evenings, sit around and kiss for a while, some snuggle up for an episode of Top Gear, others have Friday night dinner dates, or watch a chick-flick (c'mon guys.... admit it), and find a comfy couch to share a few smooches, some go mountain hiking, or just find a good book to read together... and swap a few pecks after every chapter. But Ian and I have been way more creative with our quality time ;) Haha!

The truth is - those are all activities that define our relationship. And spending quality time together in those ways has strengthened and matured our bond in friendship, courtship and now engagement.

Oddly enough, we really do like to read together. Or.... er, I think it's a good idea so I suggest it (on a Sunday afternoon typically) to which Ian face-palms and groans, "Another book about relationships?" And I reply with a superior air, "Yes. I have a BA in Psychology, therefore, I believe it's important for all couples to discuss the various factors and levels of their relationship in order to maintain healthy intimacy." To which Ian face-palms again.

But no, really, Ian and I have found it quite helpful to read a smattering from a few resources now and then. Certain topics or pieces of information from scholarly sources have spurred on discussions between the two of us about who we are as individuals, our future family goals, our Biblical knowledge of finances, or how to serve the Lord. I thought I'd share with you some of the books that Ian and I have enjoyed (below each cover is a personal description), and I hope you will post in return some of the resources you and yours have gleaned from as well.

We started flipping through this one when we were new at getting to know one another. Never finished it but it was helpful to get the ball rolling on some of the topics, such as how we mimic our same-gender parent in relationship roles.

This book was given to us by a dear older married man that Ian stayed with while we visited Dayton last Spring. We have used this resource as a reference when we need to fix (understand) the other lightbulb ;)

This devotional, gifted to us by my dad, journeys through the wisdom and the application of God's Word. It's been refreshing for us to meditate together and to pray through scripture.

Yes, we have picked up this on occasion. Though Ian might be a little embarrassed by the cover. But, we may actually use a passage from it in our wedding ceremony. This little book is a compilation of Elisabeth Elliot's nougats of advice (written journal style) to her engaged daughter. She artfully, tactfully explained in a series of notes about the reality of marrying a sinner, which Ian and I read together, and it helped us approach our expectations of one another reasonably.

Our pastor - Irwyn Ince - from City of Hope is currently taking us through the chapters of this premarital counseling book. Ian and I would recommend this to any couple that has not yet delved into pertinent topics concerning marriage and family and all the things that go along with preparing to be life-partners. This book covers a range of topics and facilitates introspection and group discussions. Irwyn is taking me and Ian through it with a different spin, since we have already traversed a lot of ground in our period of dating.

This was Ian's Valentine's gift to me ;) The poor man had been through hell and back that particular week of fire academy, and all he could think of was how to survive..... and then give me something for Valentine's to show me how much he needed me to understand what he was going through. We are in the process of gleaning from this resource.

Please do share with us any funny, clever, insightful pieces of literature or advice that you have utilized in your relationship. Clearly, Manly and Babe love to learn :)